Kovalchuk traded to Devils

Per USA Today, Ilya Kovalchuk and Anssi Salmela have been traded to the New Jersey Devils. This comes on the heels of Kovy turning down the Thrashers' $101m/12yr contract offer earlier today.

Atlanta received Johnny Oduya (D), Niclas Bergfors (RW), Team Canada U-20 Captain Patrice Cormier (F) (yes, THAT Patrice Cormier, he of the Peoples' Elbow on Mikael Tam (article/video #2)- interestingly enough, his 2nd major elbowing offence, the first occurring against Anton Rodin during the Canada/Sweden WJC game in December of 2009. ) and a 1st round pick in 2010. The teams will also swap their 2010 2nd round picks.

Good luck with that, Jersey. And good luck with the trap, Kovy.

I've been sick, things happened.

Yeah sorry about not updating since whenever. I've been pretty sick. The Bruins have been pretty laissez-faire. The Leafs, while I don't really give too much of a crap other than about Schenn, have been downright fucktacular. So what's there been to write about. Let's see, I think I can sum up every thing I've missed in a few bullet points.

• Milan Lucic came back from his high ankle sprain and it's taken him about 6 games to start rounding back into form, and took I think 5 for him to score. 
• Marc Savard came back from a tweaked MCL and it took him one game to set up Lucic, and to get the 17-91-81 line back together. Please note: I will never, ever, ever NOT find it hilarious that 17-91-81 is back together with SATAN on the 81 jersey. Irony is my favourite mistress. 
• Marco Sturm came back from something or the other and scored in his first game back.
• Patrice Bergeron came back from a broken thumb and scored in, I believe? His first game back. 
• David Krejci did an almost admirable job of centring the top line whilst the other top centres were out.
• Vladimir Sobotka was awesome.
• Marc Recchi should never be allowed to take faceoffs unless someone else is tossed out of the circle.
• Somehow the Bruins beat the Sharks while missing their top 3 centres, and 3 of their top defencemen. Zdeno Chara taking a slapshot from 15' away in the shootout was one of the greatest things ever.
• Everyone hates Dennis Wideman. I don't. I think he is still pretty great. He's just having the same shitty streak half the team seems to be having. What's up with some dumb bitch going to the PJ Drive and asking him to sign a "How to Skate" book and nagging him about how he sucks? I don't see her out there playing in the NHL. Nice fanship, twatwaffle. 
• I think the Leafs won a game in January.

Then there is the oft-churning rumour mill spouting that the Bruins are looking to pick up Ilya Kovalchuk and/or Dion Phaneuf, with the word in the pipeline that Atlanta wants a player, a prospect, and a pick for Kovy. First off, I find that hard to believe. Unless the player is like, Evgeni Malkin. If Kovy came to Boston, the only untouchable player  in the trade coffers would be Marc Savard, because the whole point of putting Kovy in Black and Gold would be to reunite that scoring tandem. Add in the fact that there's no player on the current roster that any GM in his right mind would give up, that would free up enough cap space, and that Chia-pet has already said there's a better chance of the Leafs winning the Cup this year than there is of him trading that pick he got for Kessel.... Kovy ain't coming to Boston.

And then I come online before dinner to find out the Leafs made a blockbuster trade for Gigurere and Phaneuf. And really, all I have to say about that is, maybe Jason Blake can get some colour on his pale ass out in California, and thank fucking GOD Phaneuf isn't going to Boston. Someone let me know when Burke fires Wilson and I might start paying attention to the Leafs again. Poor Luke Schenn. On the plus side, at least for Schenn, he's now got a new buddy (who's been assigned straightaway to the Marlies) in the system in Keith Aulie, former Wheat King and teammate of a one Brayden Schenn. Find the positives where you can, people.

The Bruins have actually started playing really well, and frankly would've won last night if Thomas' backward momentum on Dustin Brown's shootout goal hadn't slid him and the puck into the net. The Bruins SHOULD have won that game, all things considered. Yeah, sure, they only really delivered about 50 minutes of 65, but you can see last year's Bruins finally starting to come back together. God damned shame it's taken 4 months of the season. And with 2 points separating 6th from 12th in the Eastern Conference.... it should be a fun spring.

Lastly, I would like to say that I love Jack Edwards. No one has more fun than him. And Andy Brickley who has the joy of sitting next to him night in, night out, often wondering when he'll get that 7 second delay and a censor button. Here was last night's (and probably the year's) GEM from Edwards, to kick off the overtime period:

"Krejci and Wheeler are the forwards for Claude Julien in this overtime, with Matt Hunwick and Johnny Bucyk on defence." Insert very long silence where Brick must have just been staring at Jack open mouthed while Jack waited for him to say something, then he realised his mistake. "Oh! I mean Boychuk. Haha, I bet Johnny Bucyk wishes he was out there, eh? Well, they're both from Edmonton, there must be some relation somewhere down the line."

The caveat in this is that, yes, Bucyk and Boychuk are derivatives of the same Ukranian last name, bastardised upon entry into North America, and while I suppose at first glance, the two look similar, I can't really figure out how one could forget that Johnny Bucyk hasn't laced 'em up for the Black and Gold since 1978, and was actually a left winger, not a d-man. But hey, whatever, you win some, you lose some. Well played though, Jack.

Up next for the Bruins are the mighty Caps, who will be missing defenceman Mike Green for the game, who threw an irresponsible peoples' elbow at someone's head and got himself a 3 game suspension. Here's to hoping last year's Bruins show up for this one as well.

Congrats on your 3 wins in January, Boston!

But I'm not all doom, gloom, and sarcasm. A friend of mine found the greatest photo ever of Marc Savard, and I will share it with you, because that's how I do. While probably the most innocuous split-second in a long-forgotten game, this, people, is the reason to get into sports photography. Because every once in a thousand photos, you get something like this:

And that, my friends, is a beauty.

Gather round my loves, it's picture time!

B's pull a sweet win over the Sens (I rather enjoyed how the B's toyed with their emotions, letting them think they MIGHT have a chance to win, then RIPPED all hope out of their hands with the Savard goal!) and was the first team to reach 30 wins this season, having done it in 42 games. Well played, Bruins, well played indeed! Kari got his 1st shutty of the year, 12th of his career, Jimmy Slats had possibly his best game of the year, and holy shit the Thrashers potted 4 goals, and played some damned good defence. Slap my ass and call me Charlie! Although someone, perhaps Valabik as he seems to have learnt and settled down a bit, should take Boults aside and have a word with him about how to pick your battles.

Anyway, moving on, moving on. Look. Teh pictures! So pretty! If ANYONE has a photo of Savvy doing the glove pump up towards the crowd after his goal, I will be your best friend forever, and talk about how amazing you are to my crowd of 9 faithful readers, and then they too will love you! Oh and also, check out this great article on the B's!

As always, pics resize to 1024 etc etc etc. Don't you guys know this by now??

Goal!

Another goal!

 

Goal love!

More goal love!

And even MORE!

This team scores a lot...

Thorty puts it to Neiler

Smoosh

Smash

And POW!
I love that Z's laughing at Fish.

---

Kärrrrrrrrrrrppä!

Army thought he could fly... or something?

Russian/American goal love. I love this game!

I THINK Boults is trying to hug Oyster.

Save

Save

Another...

Y uno mas

Man it's like all this guy did all night was stop pucks!

.... oh wait.

Some more photos from last night

These are all from the AP presswire and for whatever reason, they only release small versions. So. There you have it. Enjoy anyway.

Why is "(hockey player) looks on" the favourite caption
of every photo distributor? Can't they "watch?"

And that which will surely piss off some Thrash fans (OK, I'll admit, I don't like seeing Tobi smooshed either), but it's Serzhya, and you know how I love my Belorussian:

Now that's a butt-check!

Game day preview, stuff from around the league

From the AJC:

"Yesterday I didn't feel good at all," Kovalchuck said. "It was a little bit scary actually; I couldn't even go in the bathroom. Those doctors and trainers are unbelievable. I think I'm going to be ready to go tomorrow."

Does it scare the crap out of anyone else that he'll be playing tonight? Back = core. If you fuck that up, you could prematurely end your season. We'd rather risk losing the games and let Kovy take the time to be absolutely certain he is at 100%, rather than saying "I can play" because we all know hockey players are like the dude in Monty Python who kept saying "It's just a flesh wound!" Even we have been guilty of saying, we need points in October and November so we don't have to fight in April. But you know what? We'd like Kovy to be active in April just in case we do have to fight for those points.

---

Pavelec will get the start tonight against the Kittens. Reading NHL.com's preview, they don't really know what to say about it, so someone slapped a whole bunch of stats together. Here's the thing. The Panthers suck. Sorry if you like them, but they're a joke of a team. The only things they've got going for them are Jay Bouwmeester on D, Vokoun in net, and Jokinen up front. (coincidentally, we just went to check something on their site and see that those three are also nominated for the All-Star balloting... coincidence?) Not even the great Roberto Luongo could make this team look good, and Todd Bertuzzi (who, we won't lie, we hoped would've gotten lost in Alligator Alley and eaten) opted to spend most of his season there injured/healing rather than put on that sweater. Vokoun is the only reason they've won any games at all. Against the Thrashers, he's 1-3-1-0 lifetime. He hasn't really seen this team much having just come over from the Western Conference.

We're sure some uppity Panthers fan (do the Panthers HAVE fans?) will find this and post some snotty comment, so go ahead. We throw down the gauntlet and welcome it. Prove to us how the Panthers are anything resembling competent without those three guys, and we'll show you a pee-wee team that'll hand them their asses after putting on a clinic.

If the boys bring their A-game, and play like they can, then we'll pick the Thrash by 2.

---

30 Games in 30 Nights. Go check him out. How jealous are you of this guy? Probably about as jealous as we are. This might be the coolest NHL journey in the history of evar. Steve will be in Atlanta on 19 December for the game against his beloved Bolts. Drop him a line to welcome him to A-town, and hey, if you've got an extra ticket, why not offer it up?

---

Love him or hate him, you have to give big ups to Eric "The Big E" Lindros. Yesterday during his retirement announcement, he made a $5m (what's that, like a buck eight-two American?) donation to the London Health Sciences Foundation. It is the largest single donation by any professional Canadian athlete in history. Big, big ups, Big E. We here at FWH followed your career from the beginning. We've always rooted for you, even if we were quietly laughing along with the jokes. We hope you are at least nominated for the Hall of Fame, if not inducted, but realise that chances are slim-to-none on you being awarded entry. Best of luck in all your future endeavors, Mr. Lindros.

---

Did you hear the one about the Caps beating the Sens 4-1?

No, that's it. It's not a joke. We're not sure what got into who, but wow. No really, wow. The Sens lost Anton "I stop pucks" Volchenkov early in the 1st, and perhaps that was as big a blow to the team's collective psyche as it was to Ray Emery. But the old adage that even a blind squirrel finds a nut once in a while still holds true. The Sens were due for their 2nd (!!!) loss of the season, and it was the Caps that handed it to them. Props to the Caps, hallelujah, holy shit, where's the Tylenol?

While we're on subject of the Caps, here's an english translation* of an interview Alexander Ovechkin gave to Sovetskiy Sport after the loss to the Thrasher on Tuesday:

What do you think of Kovalchuk's play in the last few games?
Yeah, I heard about his two hat tricks in a row. Congratulations, Ilya, you're great. I never even doubted that he could score four [in a row].

Statistically, Ovechkin has scored more points against Atlanta, and Kovalchuk has the most points against Washington. Why? Do the Thrashers not cover you enough?
Come on, they don't give me that much space. But today Atlanta's goaltender, Pavelec, had a great game. He was stopping incredible shots.

If you ever, and we mean ever, have the opportunity to sit down and talk to this guy, take it. He is all around class, and one of the nicest athletes we've ever had the pleasure to meet.

* We did not do this translation ourselves, and can not be held responsible for its accuracy. Apologies in advance if the translation is incorrect, but we are currently unable to provide a translation of our own.

Update on Kovy (from AJC)

From AJC:

lya Kovalchuk went down. The forward had just ripped a one-timer midway through the second period during a Thrashers power play and felt a sharp pain. His back hurt, and it wasn't just from carrying the team. He had back spasms and didn't return to the game.

Kovalchuk went to the locker room in hopes that his back would loosen up. It never did. And there was no convincing the Thrashers' medical staff that he could play.

"I tried my best, but the doctor said you shouldn't [play]," Kovalchuk said. "It was really tough to sit there and watch them play."

Kovalchuk said he doesn't have a history of back problems, but knocked on his head just in case. No reason to jinx an outstanding season.

Despite that, he'll get an MRI exam Wednesday.

"Just to rule out anything," Waddell explained

We fell down on the job

6 - 4

And totally didn't write a pre- or post-game report. To be honest we missed most of the game cause there was a party over at the Fire House (you know, home of the Fire Wagon? Get it? Haha?). But this is all you need to know about the Tampa game:

Images courtesy CBS Sportsline (via ModSquad)

Ilya Kovalchuk is a god among mortals. We don't know what the stats and odds are on scoring 2 hatties in 2 games, but we're pretty sure it's damned rare. We're also pretty sure neither Ovechkin nor Crosby have done it either.

Up next, the Thrash return home to take on the (returned to natural form) Craps Caps Tuesday night. And once again, just a reminder that this game is not going to be televised, so if you want to catch it, you'll have to listen online.

Wow

Instead of writing a recap of this game, We'll instead share our IMs.


[21:08] oh wow, buffalo scored 2 goals in like a minute.
[21:10] aaaaaaaand the leafs just scored.
[21:17] buffalo scored again. this period is uh may zing. i am reminded of thrash 2nd period saturday.
[21:18] toronto scored, jesus CHRIST.
[21:22] BUFFALO SCORED
[21:31] oooh first OT i've seen this season! i can't believe they went from 0-2 to 4-4 in one freakin' period.
[21:36] WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON THIS IS SICK!
[21:37] ahahahah! ahahahah kubina took a penalty in OT. ahahahahha.
[21:42] BUFFALO GOAL WITH :03.6 in OT! WOW! that's a hockey game
[21:42] this was the 6th pipe they hit tonight and the first one that fucking WENT IN

---

Sidney Crosby Revealed
23 October, 6:30pm
On Versus (check local listings)

---

Awesome feature on Kovy on Versus after the game. Look for it maybe on YouTube soon. It was filmed mostly in Duluth, and he's talking about how Hartley helped him develop his defencive game and leadership. Then there's a feature about his charity work, filmed at Jillian's. For the record, Kovy likes velvet pants, hates bowling, and is really good with kids.