I've been sick, things happened.

Yeah sorry about not updating since whenever. I've been pretty sick. The Bruins have been pretty laissez-faire. The Leafs, while I don't really give too much of a crap other than about Schenn, have been downright fucktacular. So what's there been to write about. Let's see, I think I can sum up every thing I've missed in a few bullet points.

• Milan Lucic came back from his high ankle sprain and it's taken him about 6 games to start rounding back into form, and took I think 5 for him to score. 
• Marc Savard came back from a tweaked MCL and it took him one game to set up Lucic, and to get the 17-91-81 line back together. Please note: I will never, ever, ever NOT find it hilarious that 17-91-81 is back together with SATAN on the 81 jersey. Irony is my favourite mistress. 
• Marco Sturm came back from something or the other and scored in his first game back.
• Patrice Bergeron came back from a broken thumb and scored in, I believe? His first game back. 
• David Krejci did an almost admirable job of centring the top line whilst the other top centres were out.
• Vladimir Sobotka was awesome.
• Marc Recchi should never be allowed to take faceoffs unless someone else is tossed out of the circle.
• Somehow the Bruins beat the Sharks while missing their top 3 centres, and 3 of their top defencemen. Zdeno Chara taking a slapshot from 15' away in the shootout was one of the greatest things ever.
• Everyone hates Dennis Wideman. I don't. I think he is still pretty great. He's just having the same shitty streak half the team seems to be having. What's up with some dumb bitch going to the PJ Drive and asking him to sign a "How to Skate" book and nagging him about how he sucks? I don't see her out there playing in the NHL. Nice fanship, twatwaffle. 
• I think the Leafs won a game in January.

Then there is the oft-churning rumour mill spouting that the Bruins are looking to pick up Ilya Kovalchuk and/or Dion Phaneuf, with the word in the pipeline that Atlanta wants a player, a prospect, and a pick for Kovy. First off, I find that hard to believe. Unless the player is like, Evgeni Malkin. If Kovy came to Boston, the only untouchable player  in the trade coffers would be Marc Savard, because the whole point of putting Kovy in Black and Gold would be to reunite that scoring tandem. Add in the fact that there's no player on the current roster that any GM in his right mind would give up, that would free up enough cap space, and that Chia-pet has already said there's a better chance of the Leafs winning the Cup this year than there is of him trading that pick he got for Kessel.... Kovy ain't coming to Boston.

And then I come online before dinner to find out the Leafs made a blockbuster trade for Gigurere and Phaneuf. And really, all I have to say about that is, maybe Jason Blake can get some colour on his pale ass out in California, and thank fucking GOD Phaneuf isn't going to Boston. Someone let me know when Burke fires Wilson and I might start paying attention to the Leafs again. Poor Luke Schenn. On the plus side, at least for Schenn, he's now got a new buddy (who's been assigned straightaway to the Marlies) in the system in Keith Aulie, former Wheat King and teammate of a one Brayden Schenn. Find the positives where you can, people.

The Bruins have actually started playing really well, and frankly would've won last night if Thomas' backward momentum on Dustin Brown's shootout goal hadn't slid him and the puck into the net. The Bruins SHOULD have won that game, all things considered. Yeah, sure, they only really delivered about 50 minutes of 65, but you can see last year's Bruins finally starting to come back together. God damned shame it's taken 4 months of the season. And with 2 points separating 6th from 12th in the Eastern Conference.... it should be a fun spring.

Lastly, I would like to say that I love Jack Edwards. No one has more fun than him. And Andy Brickley who has the joy of sitting next to him night in, night out, often wondering when he'll get that 7 second delay and a censor button. Here was last night's (and probably the year's) GEM from Edwards, to kick off the overtime period:

"Krejci and Wheeler are the forwards for Claude Julien in this overtime, with Matt Hunwick and Johnny Bucyk on defence." Insert very long silence where Brick must have just been staring at Jack open mouthed while Jack waited for him to say something, then he realised his mistake. "Oh! I mean Boychuk. Haha, I bet Johnny Bucyk wishes he was out there, eh? Well, they're both from Edmonton, there must be some relation somewhere down the line."

The caveat in this is that, yes, Bucyk and Boychuk are derivatives of the same Ukranian last name, bastardised upon entry into North America, and while I suppose at first glance, the two look similar, I can't really figure out how one could forget that Johnny Bucyk hasn't laced 'em up for the Black and Gold since 1978, and was actually a left winger, not a d-man. But hey, whatever, you win some, you lose some. Well played though, Jack.

Up next for the Bruins are the mighty Caps, who will be missing defenceman Mike Green for the game, who threw an irresponsible peoples' elbow at someone's head and got himself a 3 game suspension. Here's to hoping last year's Bruins show up for this one as well.

Congrats on your 3 wins in January, Boston!

But I'm not all doom, gloom, and sarcasm. A friend of mine found the greatest photo ever of Marc Savard, and I will share it with you, because that's how I do. While probably the most innocuous split-second in a long-forgotten game, this, people, is the reason to get into sports photography. Because every once in a thousand photos, you get something like this:

And that, my friends, is a beauty.

The good and the bad

Good

FWH long-time friend Robbie Schremp scored his first NHL goal tonight against Vezina-winning goaltender Tim Thomas. You go Tater Tot! Keep 'er up! Just not against the B's, eh? Love you!

Signature Schrempie knee-drop fist-pump.

Now THAT'S goal love.

Bad
Luke Schenn is a healthy scratch. Was it the turnover that led to Krejci's goal that sealed the deal? I'm not sure. I took way too much joy in the Bruins' win to notice any additional mistakes he may have made. I just hope that this serves to bolster him and strengthen his resolve, rather than weaken him further and rattle him and his game.

 

Sad Luke. =[ At least he has on a new suit?

Thanks to Sasky for the screen cap.  

Believe in Schenn

Ron Wilson does not:

But I do. And if you do, spread this around. Or make a new one. Believe in Schenn. Someone has to.

Supporting Schenn | Tonight is what Tivo is for

There's a super nice (SHOCKINGLY) article on Luke Schenn in this morning's Star. Someone in Toronto make a sign and take it to the ACC tonight for warmups, and hold it right behind Ron Wilson's head. It should say "YOU NEVER BENCHED WITTER!" Also potentially appropriate, "CAN'T FIRE WILSON CAUSE YOU HIRED HIM FOR TEAM USA? GO CANADA!" I'm just saying.

Get those little digs in where you can, Torontonians, because Wilson sucks as a coach. Can he just get the sack and Burkie ring up Tim Armstrong and have him come take this dude's place?  If CR belongs behind any bench, it's with a big fat ASSISTANT before the word coach. I can't figure out where the hell Army went after the Capitals switched affiliations from Portland to Hershey, but if anyone can lead the Leafs out of the valley and closer to the mountaintop, it's this guy. The first year he coached in Portland, the Pirates went from 12th in the conference with 80 points, to 1st in the conference with 114. I can't remember subsequent seasons, or find ANY information on him on the internets - TIM ARMSTRONG WHERE ARE YOU? Because I sense another Bruce Boudreau situation waiting to happen should Timmy get the call. Make it happen Burkie. The world will forgive you even though you hired Wilson to coach Team USA. But let's be honest, Team USA ain't winning gold anyway. It'll be Canada and Sweden in the final, mark my words.

Sorry, I digressed. We were talking about Luke. Don't bench him. That's the bottom line. He's a fragile little bunny right now, trying to find his confidence and his game again. You really think benching him will give him "the ability to watch the game from up high" and let him lick his wounds? WRONG. That's what IR is for. You just don't do that to a potential franchise defenceman. Case in point: Steve Eminger. Go look him up. He was supposed to be one of the Caps' franchise defencemen and then bounced all over the place after Wilson fucked him up too.

I can go on about this all day, can't I? Here's Luke looking pretty cause all the ladies in the place, I'm callin' out to ya'!

Anyway, tonight is the kind of night Tivo was made for. The Leafs are taking on the WORST team in the league (ha ha Carolina, HA HA!), and the Bruins are down in Atlanta taking on the 4-win-streak-having Thrashers. Plus Lucic and Savard are rumoured to be game-time decisions. With Savard being higher in the "rumour" category than the "reality" category, but no one be surprised if Savvy takes to the ice for warm ups, cause that is just the kind of guy he is. Wysh, over at Puck Daddy, wrote a pretty interesting article about the return of the Lord and his protector. Give him a read. Just skip the parts where he quotes Kathryn Tappen.

So here's what I'm thinking, if you're a betting kind of fan. Keep Schenn in uniform and let him build some confidence against a shit team. I put the line on this game at 4, and I suggest you take the over. Bruins in Atlanta, with a returned Lucic, and possibly Savard taking the warm-ups, this'll have a HUGE psychological impact on the B's so I'm setting the line at 6, and definitely take the under.

THANK YOU TIVO, FOR BEING INVENTED, SO I CAN WATCH ALL THE GAMES. AMEN!

Bits & Pieces - Bs and Leafs (Milan Lucic up for auction)

Item the first: Marc Savard and Milan Lucic are both to be game-time decisions for playing tomorrow night. Do not let my calm, normal text deceive you. I'm flipping my shit because this has the potential to be the best thing ever. Then again, Pony shut out the Kings 7-0 last week and the Thrashers are on a 4 game win streak. Oh the delicious irony.

Item the second: He made like TWO fucking mistakes on one shift in the third, a 42 second shift if memory serves, and Wilson benched this kid for the rest of the game:

I've read a few things about his fight, and his game, that I disagree with. First off, he was bleeding BEFORE he took on Neil, from Neil cross-checking him in the back as Luke tried to get up from being boarded (if that wasn't boarding, Neil has a career as a prima ballerina when he leaves the game, cause he must've been on the TIPPY TOE of his blade, and frankly, it's Chris Neil. It's not above him to leave his feet). Schenny was on his knees, facing the boards when Neil circled back and smacked him in the back with his stick, causing Luke's face to kiss the boards, helmet askew thus leaving his face unshielded. Watch the replay. You can see the mark the edge of the visor left along his forehead, leading to the laceration. If I'm wrong, mea culpa, but that's how it looked on the Leafs version of the Rogers' broadcast. But I'm not usually wrong.

Secondly, look at how much damage the kid was already playing with. A healing blood blister in his left thumb (and he's left handed), healing bruises on his left hand from punching guys (what was this? 5th fighting major of the season? Has he been hanging out with Lucic? Hmmmm?), looks like his nose has recently been broken (again), and he appears to putting his jaw BACK into place. And then there's that flap of skin above his eyebrow that's gaping and had to be stitched close, cause super glue ain't helping that one. So the kid's just gotten stitched back up and put back together like Frankenstein's monster, he goes out in the 2nd, and OK he was on for one goal against, but he was also on for a goal for. Ruutu then made him a target for the rest of his time on the ice, and when he REALLY started fucking with Luke, John Mitchell (OF ALL PEOPLE) had enough and went after Ruutu. Did I take the blue pill? What was going ON with this game?!

Thirdly, whatever idiot wrote in the Sun or Canada post or wherever the hell it was that Luke "tripped" over Toskala obviously wasn't paying attention the split second BEFORE, when he was hit in the chest with a slapshot that knocked him over. Details, people, try paying attention to them. Shortly thereafter, or perhaps on the same play, it's all blurring at this point, Luke coughed up the puck.

And did not return to the ice.


I'm going over all of this in my mind and trying to decide if Wilson benched him for his own safety, or to send him a message. If it was a message, here's a message, Crazy Ron - go fuck yourself. If it was for his own safety, I'm also of the same mind in my message. Hockey players are the toughest guys you will ever meet. This is a 20 year old kid who's trying to adjust to new partners, new teammates, a slightly different system, and living up to hype. Let him fucking play. Let him make mistakes. I mean seriously, at this point, how much worse can it get? What's he gonna do, let the other team score ANOTHER goal? Whether they're losing by 1 or by 10, they're still losing so let the kid play. Let him find his legs, let him find his game, and stop kicking him while he's down. And while we're at it, someone get the kid some Peas for his face and hands. Greatest thing evar.

Item the third: If you happen to be in Boston on the 27th and 28th of November, you will be able to bid on this spec-fucking-tacular painting of Milan Lucic, created by Russian artist Veronika Loginova. I WANT that. I don't have the money to participate in an auction for it, but that is BEAUTIFUL. Click it to enlarge so you can see the actual texture of the nets in the painting, and how awesome that she used Looch's awesome hit in Seidenberg from last year's playoffs. This is truly an amazing work of art. I expect it to go for no less than $1,500USD. And frankly, that's a steal. I'm not sure of the size of the painting, but depending on size, and if it comes framed or just on stretched canvas, it could realistically go for up to $10k. If I had more information I could use my knowledge of paintings to help you out on a more accurate price. But the proceeds are going to the Boston Sports Museum, who I hope is busy making an awesome fake of it to hang up in their gallery (note: making a fake of a masterpiece is easier than you'd imagine).  So anyway, hit the Garden on the 27/28th and make a bid! THAT COULD BE HANGING OVER YOUR FIREPLACE! Or bed, whatever blows your skirt up.

Kessel, Lehtonen, Lucic, Schenn

Coming up with post titles is hard.

Wait, quick story that semi-relates to that. So a long time ago, I used to do a website for this NHL player (who is no longer playing, btw - see? I'm a curse.). He was an extremely popular player at the time, for his mad fighting skills, and one of the promotions I did was print out about 50 pictures of him beating another guy's ASS in one of the top fights in the NHL (tip: vs. a Bruin), and I wanted him to sign them all for giveaways. He had no problem with that, but he's standing there signing them, and we're just shooting the shit while he does, and after about the 30th picture, he just randomly says, "I really hate having a 5 in my number." I just blinked and stared at him blankly. "Writing 5's is really hard. Especially when you have to do a lot of them." True story, I do not lie. Well I do sometimes, but I swear to fucking god, that is the absolute gospel of that story.

Moving on. Today's topics have been easily summarised in alphabetical order because I'm beyond witty titles right now. So let's go.

Phil Kessel
I will go ahead and retract what I said about how I didn't think Kess would be as good on the Leafs as he was on the Bruins. Not to say I think he'll be the Leafs' saviour, but he damned sure appears to be trying. What I noticed last night, specifically, was that instead of needing Marc Savard dishing to him, he's figuring out how to find, predict, and snatch random passes. Which I applaud. Phil Kessel I applaud you! Truculence.

Kari Lehtonen
PM: I hope you got a laugh out of it, and the glitter didn't cause an international incident.

Milan Lucic
Today Looch joined the B's for the pre-game skate. Not cleared yet to shoot a full slapper, but he was taking snappers and wristers, and half-assed slappers. He was sporting the Dmen's black jersey, which is a huge step up from the no-contact red jersey. Looch, you heal that finger and get back on the ice. And Savvy, you heal that foot. Despite the B's being .500 right now, and playing their asses off in a lot of games for little (1pt) or no results, I honestly believe that the double threat of Looch & Savvy is gonna help lift the B's up into a higher spot in the conference. I BELIEVE!

Luke Schenn
Oh Luke. Luke, Luke, Luke. How do we find you the confidence you so desperately need? Is the pressure too much? Is being referred to  as "Our Luke and Saviour" just too much? The media turning on you getting to you? You need to compartmentalise, sweetheart! Fuck the bloggers. Fuck the media. Fuck everything and everyone. You got to the Show and had a phenomenal rookie season. It's only 16, 17 games into the season. No one fails to live up to their hype, or falls short on expectation, or washes up after only 16 or 17 games. Tear up the next reporter that asks you about the sophomore jinx. Take up boxing in your spare time and really learn how to kick some ass. And not do... this.





Boxing also helps release stress. Unfortunately, confidence isn't something anyone can help you find, you just need to  have more faith and belief in yourself. And fans? Have some faith in #2. He at least is still living up to his Human Eraser nickname, even if it goes unnoticed in the face of his mistakes:

And just a little reminder of how awesome of a player Luke is, because a lot of people seem to have forgotten of late:

And as a small self promotion, though I'd be surprised if you got this far, I'm selling some jewelry on eBay. You should buy it. It's very nice. And proceeds of the sale will go to keeping me insured while unemployed. Thank you!

Witty title here - B's and Leafs in review

First off, I would like to point out that I WAS RIGHT. Not too long after posting my rant about how Wilson is ruining Schenn by breaking his confidence, and how he pretty much sucks as a coach, a former player under Wilson, Jim Thomson, went on Off the Record, and said the exact same damned thing. 

Off The Record guest Jim Thomson, who played for Wilson with the Anaheim Mighty Ducks during the 1993-94 season, lashed out at his former coach on Thursday, saying that while Leafs general manager Brian Burke is a "good hockey man", Wilson was lacking.

"Ron Wilson is not a good coach," Thomson told OTR. "Where it breaks down is he can't motivate players, he doesn't know what to do with players when there's controversy and they are losing."

Thomson also took Wilson to task for his handling of young blueliner Luke Schenn, who struggled during the Leafs 2-1 loss to the Ottawa Senators on October 6.

"When he calls out Luke Schenn three games into the season, a young player who's their future, and starts beating the hell out of him...You don't call a player out in the media, you go behind closed doors," Thomson stated.   "I watched him do it to Oleg Tverdovsky in Anaheim, and he ruined the kid's career."

I really want to gloat about how I was right, but case in point is, it's nothing to gloat about. This once again raises my battle cry to fire Wilson. Keep Zettler though! He's helping Luke find his game. And someone find Tim Armstrong and bring him in as head coach for the Leafs.

While on the subject of the Leafs, I was fascinated watching the last half of the game last night. This team DOES know how to play hockey. Why it took them 7 or 8 games to realise that, I've no idea. I couldn't tear my eyes away, nor could I help but be filled with glee that the 'Nucks hit the post 3x on an empty net. Fate? Only until they potted that last attempt.

Luke Schenn, if you happen to read this... I need to give you a quick education in fighting:

Kiddo, you keep holding your fist like that and it's only a matter of time before you break your damned hand. I was very pleased with the few great lefts he did get in on Glass (best last name EVAR for a fighter?), but that is a damned tragedy waiting to happen. Here is how to properly make a fist while punching someone:

Hand loosely curled, upper fingers tucked with the thumb over them, lower fingers flat, and you hit with your lower fingers. If you hold your thumb on the side of your index finger, there's nothing to keep your hand in position and voila - broken finger or hand or wrist. Watch Fight Club, or one of the many Lucic fights, for further illustration. You're welcome.

Moving onto the Bruins... I have to share this simply due to the hilarity. Last night I was flipping between the B's and Leafs, and I was captivated by the Leafs' ability to play hockey at the end of the third, and I missed the B's tying up the Sens. And this happened:

[21:32] me: i'd like to see krejci start doing something with his game.
[21:33] ****: ..... >:-(
[21:34] me: oh haha who scored? i was watching the leafs ACTUALLY PLAYING HOCKEY!!! IMAGINE!!!! the mind. it boggles.
[21:34] ****: fucking Krejci!!! :P!!!!
[21:35]: me: LMFAO NO WAI!!!!!

And what a beautiful goal it was. It's like I'm magic or something. Then I said in OT I'd like to see Sobotka score, and I believe he rang his next shot off the pipe. Thanks for the goal, Krejc. My fantasy team thanks you, and I thank you for a great win on my birthday!

The Bruins are playing surprisingly well despite the rash of injuries they're suffering through right now (and when I say rash, what I really mean is, their entire top line for most of last season is gone). They're still having a bit of a time delivering a full 60 minutes consistently, but they get down and dirty when it counts. And I can't complain, considering they're almost dead even with their stats from the same time last year. The biggest problems right now for them are goals allowed (2.9 v 2.4 last year) and the power play - 15%? Really? REALLY? I know Savvy was really their power play guy, but it shouldn't matter. Now that Krejci's gotten his first goal, I'm hoping he'll really step it up to be the QB on the PP, and get things going. Is 15% the worst in the league? That's just sad. Especially with Big Z on the point. Come on now, Bruins. Work it out.

I would like to thank Sean at my favourite Leafs blog - Down Goes Brown for making me follow up every mention last night of "Kyle Wellwood" with "is fat." Go give him a read if you haven't yet. He's possibly one of the best bloggers I've ever read, and that's saying something.

Six more days til Halloween - what are you going as?

Schenn shirts now available / Leafs analysis

Having done about a thousand Google searches of my own for Luke Schenn shirts, I'm pleased to share with the world that they're now available for purchase through the ACC Centresports Store. You can either go in to purchase one, or have it shipped to you. It's the regular blue shirt with white TML logo, and SCHENN / 2 on the back. Cost is $32.59CDN, plus $20 shipping if you need it shipped. If you're in the US, that works out to $50.43USD. You can purchase by calling the Centresports Store at 416/815.5746. M-S 10:00-17:00, U 12:00-17:00.

In semi-related news, I'm thinking about slapping this on a shirt and having them printed up:

Possibly with SCHENN/2 on the back. Thinking it over. Obviously that one would be for the laaaadies. I'm trying to find a good picture for the general public. And I'm also trying to figure out how to manipulate the Obama blue/red into Toronto Blue/White and also Bruins Black/Gold so that I can make some Bruins ones. I mean, hello? Who wouldn't want LOOCH SMASH? Mmmhm.

Analysis: What's Wrong With the Leafs?

Anyway I said I was going to get into what's wrong with the Leafs today. I'll stick with my former assessment and say "everything." They really do need to sit down as a team and watch Miracle, because the legs DO feed the wolves, gentlemen, and from the drop of the puck last night, they team almost consistently skated as if they were in mud. If it's spring, if they're playing in a warmer city, that's almost acceptable. But it's nearing winter, and they're playing on home ice. It was nearly painful to try and watch - particularly the part where Sean Avery mentioned how every team he's on plays above .500. Am I the only one who wanted to beat him with a shoe? Obviously not, that was a rhetorical question.

What I think is really wrong with the Leafs is Ron Wilson. Very likable man, but not a good coach. I'm almost never one to say "FIRE THE COACH!" but in this instance, I think that's really the only thing that can be done to turn this team around. All the pieces are there in terms of cog in the team wheel, although I'm still LMFAO that they thought Garnet Exelby would be a good addition to their d-corps. Another huge problem, last night at least, was playing Schenn on the left. Don't put a young D-man on his off-side just so you can pair him up with a different partner. That's how you ruin an up-and-coming player's confidence, and the skill they've built thusfar. A winger is one thing, because the wingers are constantly switching sides as the plays develop, but a defenceman's another story entirely, especially a teenager. Let him get used to the system, let him re-find his NHL legs, let him get used to all the new d-men he's got on the team before you go rattling him and moving him to the off-side. Unsettling your players is the last thing you want to do when you're working your way towards the lifetime achievement of "worst start in the history of the NHL" (although, are the Isles up there too, poor JT). Shaking up the lines and pairings is one thing. Switching players to their off-wing, off-side, or unnatural position is another thing entirely, and is, dare I say, stupid. Tonnes of Leafs fans are hoping and praying Phil Kessel is the saviour they want Schenn to be and I hate to break it to them, but without a quality centre, which they STILL don't seem to have, considering the last 7 games, Kessel is just going to be another struggling player in a system already full of them.

In summation: Keep your young star D-man on his correct side, find a really amazing centre (I'm thinking Kadri here), fire the coach, set the lines and let them fucking be. And have those boys bag skate and stickhandle through an entire rink of cones, until they puke, because the stickhandling and skating is just out-of-control bad.

It's autumn, the Leafs must be falling

First off, I'd like to congratulate the Leafs on being the WORST incarnation of this team since the team's inception. That is some kind of special. I honestly can't really remember any team starting off the season with a 6 game losing skid. I mean, like ever, in my 20+ years of hockey watching. I'm sure there might've been. Phoenix maybe? Columbus! The Caps sucked for a long time. Which brings me 'round to something...


See I have a particular affinity for the Ron Wilson coaching staff, particularly one Tim Hunter. Mostly cause they're seriously cool guys, and Tim let my friends and I wear his Stanley Cup ring once, and I've never felt so cool in my life. Plus that's the closest I'll ever get to a Stanley Cup ring unless I steal one. Which I wouldn't. I mean, where would I wear it? But I really like Crazy Ron and Hunts and Zettler.  But... like does no one remember the years AFTER the Caps went to the Cup final with them? You know, the... what, 7, 8 years when the Caps SUCKED? When the cheers in the stands when the other team scored were "Nah-nah-nah-nah-nah HEY! WE SUCK!" ? When we booed our own goalies? When everyone came to games dressed as empty seats? When the team was so bad that while sitting in our seats, my mates and I would discuss the potential cities the team would be moving to, and what their names might be? (Seattle Lattes was my personal favourite.) In a way, Wilson, Hunter and Zettler remind me of Jose Theodore and Johan Hedberg. Each had one REALLY GREAT SEASON in their respective positions, and ever since then they've been failing at living up to that legacy.

I'm not a huge Leafs fan. I love Luke Schenn and Nazim Kadri, I hate Mike Komisarek, even though my girlfriend wants to climb him like a redwood and do things to him that are illegal in most of the lower 48. Of course I hate Mike Komisarek, I'm a Bruins fan. But I watch the Leafs for the sake of Schenn. And in hopes that Kadri won't inherit the worst team EVER. My hopes are falling just as are the autumn leaves leafs.

Woe.

Photo courtesy AP, all rights reserved

But here's a gripe I have that has nothing to do with the shitty play of the team on the ice. Last night's game was broadcast exclusively through Leafs TV, even on Center Ice down here in the states, and for the first, oh, 45 minutes?  There was one second of sound for every 7 seconds of silence. Literally. I sat and counted as I watched for about 10 minutes. I considered muting it because really, the game was kind of better that way. The Avs hadn't scored in the first 10 minutes, but I was too lazy to press play, and I asked around to some friends who all have Center Ice on different cable and satellite carriers. They ALL had the same sound problems. Which means it came out of the Leafs TV broadcast central.

You know, it's not bad enough the team is this bad, but it adds a lot of insult to injury that they can't even get the SOUND to work on an exclusive broadcast. About 10 minutes into the 1st, I gave up and watched Ghost Hunters on DVD. After half of an excellent episode (Ghostly Conversations, if you're wondering), I turned the DVD off and lo and behold - sound! Oh, but Colorado had scored twice to the Leafs once. And remembering the Caps of yore, I knew that meant the Leafs were just going to roll over, give up, and hope no one came out of it dead.

Poor Luke Schenn. Poor Maple Leaf Fans. I'm still going to buy a Luke Schenn shirt as soon as one comes out, and I'll still refer to him as OLAS, but I don't think even Luke can turn around this trainwreck of a season. Like I said, let's just hope no one comes out of this dead. And hey, there's still the Christmas and March trade deadlines to look forward to.... or uh, something.